The feeling of accomplishment.

So, my last post was kind of the opposite of this one's title. I have been working on a short story for a while now and I have finally completed it. I was extremely pleased with it and myself. I even worked up the nerve to give my second revised draft to my best friend who agreed to be my beta.


I got the draft back today, so I have begun my sort-of-final draft. ha. I am just proud of myself for finishing this. Once it is at its best and polished form, it will go into my portfolio for the semester grade in creative writing, and it will also be submitted into a writing contest at a nearby university. Wish me luck.

Nothing.

I feel as if I am making zero accomplishments, like I am just living day to day in a haze. Time is running out; it's being wasted.. I hate this feeling.

Trapped.

Trapped inside my house for three days was horrible. I had a lot of time on my hands since I decided to be a diligent student and finish five of my papers on Monday. To pass the time, I wrote a lot while listening to my ipod. Quite dark poems and angry words scrawled across the pages without me really noticing. After taking a second to see what I had begun creating, I was taken back. Such bad, dark things I wrote. Even I myself had not realized how much I had actually kept pent up inside.


This past week has been not well. The past couple of weeks my attitude and irritability has been not well. Many things continue to aggravate me. I just want to yell at anyone who even speaks to me. Healthy, right? I just have this ongoing feeling of anger and frustration. Being stuck in a house with my brother, whose only goal in life is to make mine miserable and to see how pissed off he can get me,just adds on to it all.


And I am stuck here with no escape. No where to run and shield myself for a little while. I am stuck with my brother, with idiot so-called friends, school stress, work stress,self inflicted stress (damn perfectionism).. I'm trapping myself in my own mind with my own cruel thoughts. Maybe it's unintentional that I am cornering myself here, or maybe on a subconscious level it is just one more way I chose to make myself suffer.

Ice Storm.

Last night, we had this huge ice storm. On top of the ice, mother nature decided to add about 5 or so inches. So of course school was cancelled this morning around 5:37AM. Tonight is suppose to be much much more worse.. I am not complaining, though, I have two big papers to write for english and any extra time is welcomed. :P I've just began watching the series One Tree Hill. I absolutely love it. I am halfway through with the second season and already have received the third season for when I finish. I wishhh so badly that I could watch my episodes instead of writing these papers :\ ..


I am also reading this amazing book, Salem Falls. It is extremely well written with an interesting plot. You should check it out--Jodi Picoult's books are always brilliant. But yes, I was reading this book last night, curled up in my comforter and plush blanket nice and warm, and my mother starts to call my name.. over and over and. over. and. over. She claimed that it was extremely important that I came to her. Finally, I dropped my book down next to me and grudgingly got up to see what was so damn important. I got up to freeze to death to watch it rain and snow at the same time outside. Oh mother..


And THAT is as exciting as my night had got..
I do work tonight though; driving on these roads will be interesting.